"Only among 5 of my girlfriends, I notice that the five are efficient, kind, intelligent, hardworking, successful, loving cooking and they have their own living space, they are women between 25 and 40 years old. Some have children, others do not, but they really want them. For complete happiness, all they lack is one thing - a reliable and good man. More precisely, a husband. It's not that strong sex has completely disappeared from the horizon. But the search for a man is done with varying success. But here it is, to give his hand and his heart in addition, - it is no longer visible, it is impossible to find." The newspaper "Saturday" investigated the situation and asked the local experts: what has become of the Latvian engaged couple, what to expect and what should Latvian women do to find a husband?
The change in the system in Latvia was more easily experienced by Latvian women. Men are depressed, often die young and do not want to get married. This is the conclusion reached by British journalist Damien McGuinness of BBC News, who conducted a study on why Latvian women cannot find a suitable husband. It is a fact that the weaker sex has survived the transition to independence and capitalism more easily: women are more educated, better adapted to work and less likely to die young. As a result, they find it more difficult to find an appropriate partner of the opposite sex. The journalist supported his conclusions with sad statistics, as well as with the testimonies of two unmarried Latvian girls aged 29 who are experts in the field.
It is a fact that girls in Latvia are not interested in communicating with local guys: they are less educated, not energetic, but too spoiled by women's attention, and do not even like it. A man can sit in front of his computer for days, or lie in front of the television, while being sure that he can easily get in touch with a charming and attractive young woman, as soon as it is necessary.
Sociologist Baiba Belte said that initially more boys are born in Latvia, but somewhere between 30 and 40 years the number of women suddenly takes over from the number of men, because in this age group, male mortality is 3 times higher than that of women (!!!!). There are various explanations: driving, alcoholism and inattention in the workplace.
Psychotherapist Ansis Stabingis, who deals with suicidal thoughts and depression, is convinced that men have been hit too hard with the country's transition to capitalism and the economic crisis with unemployment. Latvia is the EU leader in terms of suicide rates. Mostly male.
The moral of this story is that it makes sense for Western single men to go in search of quality wives in the Baltic States. Or our Latvian daughters have to start thinking about the journey to the happiness of the family in the sweet Albion.
In the 30-40 age group, the mortality rate for men is three times higher than for women. Stronger sex workers are more likely to die in car accidents, die of alcoholism, and become victims of accidents in the workplace. Among the victims of suicide, 80% are men. And the suicide rate in Latvia in 2008 jumped by 16% - this is the EU record.
The first marriage after 40 years is a miracle of the cure with the help of Borzhomi, when the kidneys refused to function, says psychologist and gestalt therapist Irena Goluba:
- Recently, I spoke with a photographer who works in kindergartens. He made a sad observation: if you want to get a smile from the child, it is better not to talk to the children about their father, otherwise the mood drops suddenly. Fathers have either disappeared from their lives or otherwise it is impossible to associate them with something joyful. Alas!
I'm not going to discuss the prospect of getting married after 40 years. Overall, it's like drinking a borzoi, when the kidneys are sick...
Another subject is why there are so many single women among those aged 30 and over. Here, we must first answer the question: why did a Latvian woman reach this age without a husband and children? If there was no man in her life before that age because she was expecting an ideal prince on her white horse - it is a sad case. The second option is that the creation of the family was not of paramount importance: it studied, worked, climbed the career ladder, acquired housing... and only then did the idea come up that the "social whole" is incomplete.
These ladies generally have high demands for men. They want to be mistresses in their apartments. They need a husband like her who has also been successful and well behaved. At the same time, Latvian men aged 30 to 40 are happy, married or prefer younger girls aged 10 to 15. And women their age are appreciated as colleagues, friends, interesting companions - not even mistresses...
What is the solution? The answer is simple: do not postpone the wedding to the last line of the track record. While we can go together and grow together. Otherwise, you share the fate of the cicada - who spent the summer singing...
It is much easier for Latvian girls under 30 years of age to marry a man, still present at that age, and children are rarely an obstacle. They have an idea of family life: they know how to refuse something to someone, to reconcile their ways and habits with many people.
On the other hand, will it be the case of a solitary, intelligent, discriminating and self-sufficient beauty? Certainly not. At the slightest problem - it is easier for her to chase away man than to make compromises...
Unfortunately, modern society does not encourage men to marry at all. Sex in most cases is easy to obtain, but why else? On the continuation of the genetic lineage, most people think about it much later: for men, the reproductive age is not as short as for women.
On the other hand, strangely enough, among my clients, there were many guys who couldn't get married. Young, handsome, hardworking... But not macho, just calm and erased. And even with the girls, each one prettier than the next, the men are waiting, passive.
I've seen enough movies in which everything ends in a happy marriage. But in fact it is from this moment that everything begins....
Latvia is a country that is better represented by women. Men have lost their charisma and generate nothing original. "Office plankton is in disgusting pink shirts. "This is how the musician Andrei Yakhimovich describes the Latvian men.
- My grandmother, a Petersburger, also said: "a real man should have at least a suit (well, at least a jacket) and a coat..."
And a jacket, jeans and boots with Pinocchio's folded socks - what is it?! This "uniform" fully embodies the inner world of the man who destroyed his most beautiful years.
A man is created to generate new ideas, invent and create... And on the outside, he should be exactly like a man. Remember, what was a strong type of character - (! Single most), sailors, military pilots, truck drivers and engineers in mohair scarves with black pants and brown shoes in a way...
And now... Even the colored bandits have disappeared. Or boring in jeans, or in office plankton, radiating with aggressive good will - clean and neat, in pink shirts. And completely empty, faceless.
And who now sets the bar for male beauty? Previously, it was Alain Delon, Jean Marais, Vyacheslav Tikhonov... Now Kolya Basque or Gosha Kutsenko - have lived! Where are the modern Clint Eastwoods?! And look at the politicians: Zatlers, Dombrovskis... What happened to the sex appeal?!
And while men are always trying to explain to women how to behave, how to dress, where to go, who to flirt with, what to wear... But it's not their business! But they'll never admit their mistakes, they'll never honestly say, "Yes, I'm an idiot!" Because they're idiots.
Certainly, Latvia's main asset is women. They are the most well-kept in the world. They follow trends, go to all kinds of courses, improve...
You must be a complete idiot to buy magazines in Latvia with Pamela Andersen. In Latvia you will find tons of much more beautiful Pamela! Ladies rule here at all levels.
This is the opinion of the fashion historian and presenter of the television show "fashionable phrase" Alexander Vasilyev:
- There are several people responsible for this situation: the Bolsheviks, Lenin, Stalin and the Latvian red arrows. They have massively destroyed entire classes of the population, mainly men. The men who are now missing are potential children and grandchildren of those who were killed at that time.
If we consider the other members of the strong sex, who must share today's women, many of them can be struck off the books: they are either excessive or irresponsible drinkers, or dirty, or poorly educated. After all, a man's essence is not determined solely by the presence of the sexual organ.
In the post-Soviet space, it was said that one in ten men spent time in prison. This has had a very bad effect on education in other respects: blasphemy, drunkenness, smoking, petty hooliganism and slavery have always accompanied Soviet reality.
I remember very well Sergey Obraztsov's story "Who needs this Vaska?" About how children are locked a cat with kittens in a cardboard box and shot them with a slingshot until they are all dead.
Now the fact is clear: educated and pretty women are numerous, but there are almost no worthy men.
In a competitive environment, our Latvian women, even when buying bread in the store, are dressed up: high heels and make-up, and when they fly, they are in evening dresses worthy of the "Oscar" ceremony. They all hope to meet their knights, which is almost impossible.
I predict five possible options for improving the situation:
20 years after obtaining independent statehood, Latvia joined the European Union and successfully completed the transition to a market economy, but suddenly the Baltic countries began to suffer from a serious problem: it became clear that the country's male population had rapidly cleared up.
The "strong sex" in Latvia is only nominally so; in fact, mortality among men is much higher than among women, and few survive to maturity, let alone old age.
What do Latvian men die of? There are several reasons, and all of them, unfortunately, are very typical for the majority of CIS countries.
"As far as men are concerned, there are certain requirements, and if you don't respect them, it is easy for a Slavic man to get depressed," laments psychologist Ansis Stabingis. And in this state it's very easy to start drinking and playing at the Casino. »
"There's nothing terrible about it," she says, "It's just that there has to be a gender balance in the team." When there are people to talk to and flirt with, it's more interesting.
Both women are 29 years old, beautiful, elegantly dressed and have completed higher education, but there are too few potential partners in this country.
"That's why all my Latvian girl friends go abroad looking for boyfriends," Dania adds. The sex ratio is altered in Latvia.
Statistics show that the percentage of boys among newborns in the Baltic is higher, but as they age, the situation changes strangely. Among young people under 30 years of age, there are almost nine thousand more men than women, but there are more than three thousand among Latvian women aged 30 to 40. Due to the high mortality rate of men in the country, their total number is 8% lower than the number of women. In addition, women live an average of 11 years longer. These depressive figures alone can disappoint even the most desperate women who hate men, and there are other indirect consequences.
"Above all, men's health is affected by their dependence on excessive alcohol consumption, careless driving, as well as more frequent cases of injuries in production at work"
Baiba Bela, Latvian sociologist and teacher
For example, according to official data, the number of female students at Riga University is twice as high as that of male students, which you can see with your own eyes as you walk through the campus corridors.
According to Latvian sociologist and teacher Baiba Bela, it is more difficult to find a partner with an appropriate level of education in relation to these women.
And before the age of 30-40, when women expect to start a family, many men simply do not survive.
"In this age group, the mortality rate among men is almost three times higher - says Bela -. More than anything else, men's health influences their taste for excessive alcohol use, careless driving, and the most frequent cases of workplace injuries.
In addition, the number of suicides among the male population is almost four times higher.
The male's surviving representatives spend a lot of time in local bars and pubs.
"There is a persistent myth in Latvia that the more you can have a drink, the cooler you are - explains software engineer Agris Rieksts, 28. Everyone understands how absurd this is, but the same is true. »
This has a serious impact on the demographic situation in the country in addition to the economic crisis of 2008. The unemployment rate increased by 20% and suicide deaths jumped by 16%. Some point out that Latvian women are generally more adapted to the difficulties of life and increasingly turn to professional and specialist psychologists for help. Many women have to educate their children alone, and in such a situation, it is even more difficult to remarry.
Dace Ruksane, author, columnist of the magazine "Lilith" and one of Latvia's leading sexologists, for many she is a Latvian equivalent of the main character of the series "Sex and the City", Carrie Bradshaw.
"The smartest girls are alone." The most beautiful girls are alone if they are smart enough," she says.
According to her, in the absence of competition, men let themselves go completely, self-improvement is totally foreign to them.
"He can simply sit in front of the television and wait for the woman herself to come - complains Dace -. And if the Latvian woman doesn't suit her, another one comes along. Smart women are not necessary for this type of man.
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