A psychologist from Minsk, who visited Bishkek, shared her observations. Lilia Akhremchik wrote on her Facebook page her comments on Bishkek. The author warns that her opinion is very subjective and generalized. (Spelling and punctuation recorded)
"Kyrgyz women are beautiful. In their youth, they resemble small porcelain dolls with clean skin and regular features characteristic of Asians and Métis. They are generally smiling and well maintained. I fantasize that this is valid until they "sell themselves", in the sense that they will stay that way until they find a husband. Then all of a sudden, suddenly, the image changes: instead of a beautiful girl, she has become an aunt. There is almost no transition state. More and more European women can be beautiful women and ageless women: active, curious, sparkling, developing, etc. ", writes the author.
She also notes that if a Kyrgyz woman has children, it is immediately remarkable.
"She becomes the head of the family. But it's in the unspoken. This can be determined by its gait, by the way it is arranged in space, with the strong back and scapular belt. The mother, at the same time as the owner entered the main room - you feel it on a physical level. There is a lot of passive aggressiveness in Kyrgyz women. Often on your face you will see a smile, and inside a bunch of nerves ready to explode. And it also happens that it is not even hidden: anger is inside, anger is outside. I felt like I was walking in a minefield. Inadvertently hook someone, and this wick will detonate a bomb inside the woman from Kyrgyzstan. In any case, that's what I thought I saw. I came back to Minsk and realized that we did not have such a thing at home in Belarus. Our women are simply dull and crushed, if you steal them, they fall to the ground. - says Lilia Akhremchik.
"Crucify me, but I haven't seen handsome men in Bishkek (well, except one). Beautiful women, you will see them with every step, but there are no beautiful men. I have seen very often in the street, a very beautiful girl, who holds a guy like that by the elbows... In general, Kyrgyz women feel sorry for themselves. Okay, beauty in a man is not the main thing. There are other aspects. Kyrgyz men are lazy and comfortable. There are many good men and families, I'm sure. I strongly generalize, speaking of the majority and my personal experience. Somehow, the men of Kighiztan have changed Islam to their advantage, and have settled safely around their wives' necks, while considering them as second-class beings. If in Islam a man bears 100% responsibility for a woman, for her safety, her education, etc., and for the family as a whole, then a Kyrgyz man can beat and humiliate his wife, without being a breadwinner.
"You can only dream of being close to each other in the family. In Kyrgyzstan, you cannot divorce, because all relatives and acquaintances will condemn you. He's my husband. He can only be one, no matter how horrible his behaviour. This may be why Kyrgyz women hide their emotions, and have premature aging. Women do not live by their own logic. They can't do that. In the living environment and cultural scenarios, they are held by the whole family and family environment as hostages. "Even if he's bad, put up with him." To suffer is honorable, happy is the condemned one! If a woman is unhappy, then she is almost a saint. And no matter what she wants at the same time, no matter how she feels. If she begins to love and respect herself, she will be put back in place. We'll say, "What is she allowing herself to do? "- writes the author.
"They are still strongly attracted to prejudice, but they are already attracted to Western values: to love, protect, live, develop, choose a man, love a man, etc. They hold good jobs, earn a decent living, play sports, fitness, yoga, learn foreign languages, dance, and are fond of psychology. They read modern psychologists and try to understand themselves and their lives, they look for reasons for their dissatisfaction in Kyrgyzstan," added Liliya Akhremchik.
At the end of her publication, the psychologist noted that it is a quick look at a Slavic foreigner, who only hires her.
"I tried to be careful during the consultations, warning a thousand times that I was not from Kyrgyzstan, and only the woman herself decided how to deal with this or that awareness. The East is a delicate matter," Akhremchik concludes.
Recently, the number of outrageous cases involving Kyrgyz girls has increased. The latest, a drunk girl organized a fight on a plane, which was preparing to fly from Almaty to Kuala Lumpur.
On the Internet, there are more and more video scandals and fights involving young Kyrgyz women. For example, on the Internet, we had a video of fighting in the capital. The spokesman for the Bishkek Ministry of Internal Affairs, Myrzabek Toktosunov, said that first the girls sat quietly in a café, then they took to the streets, and there was a fight between them:
- The conflict between them has turned into a battle. The police officers who were passing by decided to separate the girls, but they encountered resistance and obscene and filthy language from the girls.
As a result, the October police department opened criminal proceedings under the article "hooliganism". Girls are at risk of a fine or five days' imprisonment.
Social network users are actively discussing the situation, but on the Internet another video was posted with a 23-year-old Kyrgyz girl who, intoxicated, arranged a brawl on board the plane, preparing to fly from Almaty to Kuala Lumpur. Because of the scandal, the flight was delayed by 45 minutes. The Kazakh police drafted an administrative protocol and imposed a fine on the girl for a significant sum.
Experts assess the behaviour of modern girls differently. Psychologist Samat Aalkanov explains their aggressiveness by the lack of appropriate education:
- The evolution of family and national values has a major influence. We are repeating what is happening in other countries. Parents beat children, we don't teach them anything. Kyrgyz values have changed.
The role of women in the Kyrgyz family and society cannot be evaluated, it is extremely important. Since antiquity, in Kyrgyz society, women have been highly valued and girls have been treated with absolute respect. Today, the principles are unclear and depreciated. Women are forced to bear the often unbearable burden of responsibility for all things in life and for everyone in society. As a result, there are changes in the social structure and, consequently, in the nature of people, says sociologist Mariyam Edilova, who studies family and gender issues.
According to her, in the early years of women's independence and the inevitable crisis that accompanies change, women had to fight for survival, they left for Russia and Kazakhstan to work. Complexes that have arisen in their children due to a lack of parental education and love can manifest themselves in this way.
"Kyrgyz girls who work abroad literally survive, which makes them stronger. Forced to work tirelessly, they relax in the same way as they work, without thinking, they smoke, they drink... ", says Mariam Edilova.
The lack of maternal love and tenderness, education as a whole has become the cause of today's realities, says author Nasypbek Asanbayev. According to him, the undereducated population has misunderstood the notion of gender equality and rights:
"As a result, young people go too far, they even abuse police officers, defending their own notion of law. This example is an illustration with this girl, Shelukha, nicknamed on the Internet. If you remember, this completely sober girl splashed the sunflower seed park, and in response to criticism, she didn't even look at it and claim her rights. Where does this girl's ambition, arrogance, self-confidence come from? In other words, it's not about drinking alcohol or anything else, it's all the consequences of lack of education.
With women who are in a bad mood, men are also to blame. Speaking of the latest events, the men in this situation have also been criticized: instead of separating the girls and taking them home, they have made fun of them and posted videos on the Internet. A Bishkek resident, Lola noted that decent men do not behave like this:
- Dignified men, patriots would bring the girls home, and would not have made a fool of themselves by claiming that they had to fight with young girls. They could also hide this without exposing Kyrgyz girls as a joke.
According to experts, the content of the video, broadcast on television and the Internet and far from moral and ethical standards, negatively affects modern Kyrgyzstan's youth. Young people try to imitate film characters whose behaviour leaves much to be desired. In addition, people have nothing to fill the spiritual space, which also remains outside the attention of the state. The writer Nasypbek Asanbayev criticised the state for the absence of a concept in the field of education for the younger generation:
- How to solve this? We must all work together on this issue. The ban on the sale of alcohol and the increase in teachers' salaries do not solve anything. Parents, family, all citizens should participate. For example, children and young people watch everything they want on television. With them, parents also watch. It's in these movies, where there are insults, and alcohol, everything is negative. They believe that they too can do it. For teenagers, it seems that stubbornness is heroism, and if it is not, then it is obsolete. Therefore, how parents will take care of children, then the state should make films that will properly influence the formation of consciousness. Unfortunately, even the heroes of contemporary Kyrgyz films are not a positive example for young people.
Orozayym Narmatova, a 22-year-old businessman from Bishkek, believes that education is important for the family and educational institutions. The Ministry of Education and Science reports that this issue is receiving increased attention in schools and that preventive measures are being taken. The representative of the Ministry Gulshan Abdyldaeva noted that the issue can be resolved by involving not only teachers but also parents in the educational process:
- The Ministry of Education and Science, Health, Social Development and Home Affairs has signed an agreement on preventive work in schools to prevent crime. The "Healthy Lifestyle" project is also working. As part of the project, girls are informed of harmful habits.
Psychologists believe that the child is always a form of ideal for parents, it is the beginning of the formation of an entire person.
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