Shared custody. This is a topic that makes many Western men jump, convinced that this system is "fair" and "balanced." Allow me to give you another perspective—that of a man who lived through the hell of this system for years with his French ex-wife. And I'm going to explain why, in my opinion, shared custody is a government tool that helps Western women feel guilt-free about abandoning their role as mothers.

I know this statement will shock many of you. Good. It's time to break some taboos.

My Personal Experience: When the Family Dream Collapses

In 2004, my French ex-wife unilaterally decided to divorce. My son was 10 years old, my daughter 9. Still very young children who needed stability, love, and parental presence. But my wife had other priorities: she wanted to "have fun" with her amateur singing career, go out, live her life as a "liberated" woman.

And what about me? I was guilty of an unforgivable crime in the eyes of modern feminism: I worked too much. Six months a year, I was traveling to work with Inuit and Indigenous communities in the Canadian Far North. A fascinating but demanding job. A job that allowed me to provide comfortably for my family.

My wife decided to "punish" me for my absence. Divorce was the first step. Shared custody was the second.

The Silent Suffering of Children

What nobody tells you about shared custody is the suffering it inflicts on children. Both my children experienced parental alienation, constant criticism of one parent in front of the other, the heartbreak of having to leave their bedroom every two weeks to start over somewhere else.

Imagine for a moment: you're 10 years old, you've just settled into your room at Dad's place, you've found your bearings, your belongings, your routine... and bam! You have to start all over again at Mom's. Then the same thing two weeks later. And so on for years.

I told this appalling story in my LIVE 238 on our YouTube channel. And I can tell you one thing: a traditional Slavic woman would never abandon her own biological children like that.

The Slavic Vision of Family: A Different Worldview

In Ukraine and Russia, shared custody simply doesn't exist in the culture. It's a purely Western invention, typical of our European and North American societies that have lost their family values.

In Slavic countries, when a couple separates, the children stay with the mother. Period. And do you know why? Because a Ukrainian woman or Russian woman will never deny her role as a mother. It's ingrained in her culture, her upbringing, her soul.

An Eastern European woman who abandoned her children would literally be pilloried by society. It's unthinkable. It's shameful. It's unnatural.

The classic pattern in Ukraine works like this:

• The father leaves his wife and children to start a new life with a new partner, often younger
• He gradually loses contact with his children from the first marriage
• The mother stays and fully assumes her maternal role, never abandoning her little ones

This is precisely why Slavic women do everything possible to preserve family unity. They know what awaits them if the couple breaks up: they'll be alone with the children. So they fight for their family.

The West: Divorce as a Business

In the West, it's the exact opposite. Divorce is subtly encouraged by governments. In Quebec, it's a documented fact: 75% of divorces are initiated by women. The main reason given? "My husband doesn't make me dream anymore..."

How can we explain thousands of divorces for such trivial reasons? The answer is simple and cynical: Western society encourages women to divorce by making their financial situation easier after separation.

Look at the statistics: it's overwhelmingly women who benefit from the financial fallout of divorce. Men are penalized by abusive deductions from their salaries. And the most effective weapon of this system? Shared custody.

Shared custody justifies the considerable sums that men must pay to their ex-wives. It becomes one tool among others to legitimize the fact that Western women no longer have to take care of their own children full-time. Shared custody removes the guilt from women who wish to abandon their families.

I myself suffered through this system. My trial was long, costly, and exhausting. I eventually won thanks to an excellent lawyer, but at what cost? Years of my life, savings swallowed up, and above all, my children's suffering.

Why Traumatize Our Children?

I openly ask the question: why do we accept making our children suffer as they move from one parent to the other every week? Why has it become "normal" to traumatize our little ones this way?

The reason is crystal clear: to allow Western feminists to rid themselves of their role as mothers while being financially compensated. The father must abandon his traditional role as provider to become a sort of part-time "second mom," while continuing to pay.

It's a lose-lose system for men. And especially for children.

The Slavic Woman: A Different Vision of Motherhood

When you meet a serious Ukrainian woman, you discover a radically different conception of family. For her, being a mother isn't a constraint to be freed from. It's an achievement, a pride, a calling.

The Slavic women we support at CQMI aren't looking for one-night stands. They're looking for a husband, a father for their children, a partner for life. As I often explain: if you're not serious, move along.

These women understand that traditional marriage—the one that unites a man and a woman for life—is the foundation of a stable society. They haven't been contaminated by the ideology that makes divorce a "liberation" and child abandonment a "lifestyle choice."

My Conclusion: Barbarism Isn't Where You Think

We're constantly told that the West is "civilized" and the East is "backward." Allow me to set the record straight.

In this specific case of shared custody and the maternal abandonment it facilitates, it's the West that's at fault, not the Slavic countries. Barbarism isn't always where we think it is.

A society that encourages mothers to abandon their children in the name of their "personal fulfillment," that turns fathers into automatic alimony dispensers, that traumatizes millions of children by making them navigate from one home to another... does this society really have lessons in civilization to teach the Slavic world?

If you're a man from France, Belgium, Canada, the US, or anywhere in the Western world, single or divorced, and you're fed up with this system, I invite you to discover another worldview. That of Eastern European women who still believe in family, marriage, and committed motherhood.

This is the message I've been carrying for years at CQMI, with my Ukrainian wife Boryslava by my side. We create happy couples, solid families, lasting unions. Our divorce rate is below 7%, compared to over 50% for classic Western couples.

The difference? Our members have never heard of shared custody. And believe me, that's a good thing.

To explore this topic further: Watch my LIVE 238: Do Ukrainian women want marriage, myth or reality? where I develop this reflection and share my personal experience.

Related articles:

• Why do Russian and Ukrainian women divorce?
• A Russian wife is expensive to maintain!
• The Main Differences between Western and Slavic women

Antoine Monnier, Founder of CQMI Agency