I've lost count of how many times I've heard this from men hesitating to join us: "It's risky, what if I get scammed? What if she doesn't reply? 100 euros for a contact, that's expensive..." Gentlemen, stop for a second. Take a breath. And finally look at the situation from a different angle.
Because the real question isn't whether you are taking risks. The real question is understanding that the Ukrainian woman who decides to leave everything behind to come live with you is taking risks a thousand times greater. And clearly, many men don't realize this.
The imbalance nobody wants to see
On our CQMI Agency website, some men hesitate for years before making the "risky" decision to pay 100 euros to get a Ukrainian woman's contact. And the objections keep coming: "It's too expensive", "What if she doesn't reply?", "What if she's a scammer?"
I understand these concerns. But now, let's do an empathy exercise. Two minutes. That's all I'm asking.
Put yourself in the shoes of this Ukrainian woman who decides to leave everything to come live in your country:
She barely knows you – She doesn't know your true nature. Maybe you'll make her suffer daily in a country she doesn't know.
She must sell or leave her home – Her apartment, her house, everything she's built over the years.
She's leaving her loved ones behind – Her childhood friends, her family, her aging parents whom she'll only be able to see once or twice a year.
She's abandoning her career – Her job, her income sources, sometimes a career built over 15 or 20 years.
She's arriving in a country where she doesn't speak the language – Imagine landing in Ukraine without speaking a word of Russian or Ukrainian.
She doesn't know the protection laws – And unfortunately, some predators take advantage of this.
She must start over professionally – A lawyer, a dentist, a doctor must begin from scratch.
She'll be 100% dependent on you – On your family, on your goodwill.
She must sell her car – If she has one.
And I'm certainly forgetting some things.
In summary: For her, it's a complete uprooting, with very little possibility of turning back. A total leap into the unknown.
Now imagine she has a child
Let's do the same exercise imagining this woman has a young child from a previous relationship. This is the case for most of our female members.
She is responsible for this child. And what can she predict about how you'll take care of him or her? Slavic women are deeply attached to their children's education – to the point where it can become obsessive in some cases.
She'll have to make decisions that don't just impact her, but also her children's entire lives. Changing schools, countries, languages, cultures, friends... for a man she's known for only a few months.
"When I think back to my decision to come to Canada with my daughter, I still get chills. It was the biggest gamble of my life. I was trusting a man I had only known for six months." – Testimony from a member married for 4 years
Your 100 euros versus her total uprooting
Do you now understand the difference between your 100 euros and the risks taken by a Ukrainian woman who would come to live with you?
The difference is so huge that there can be no comparison. On one side, you risk 100 euros and disappointment. On the other, she risks her entire life, her children's lives, her career, her family ties, her safety.
And meanwhile, some fools complain that Ukrainian women "want to flee their country to get a European or Canadian passport." When I hear this kind of talk, it makes me angry!
It's the complete inability of some men to show empathy. They look at their own navel and count their pennies, unable to see beyond their own little comfort zone.
Why we protect our female members
These are good reasons why we try to protect our female members to the best of our abilities. We never trust the first person who comes along. We take the necessary time to get to know the partner and see how they behave in different everyday life situations.
This is also why we ask the man to pay for the hotel and round-trip tickets for the woman's first visit. It's proof of seriousness and commitment.
To learn more about our secure process, check out our dating agency procedure page.
A story that still haunts us: My wife and I will always remember this man from Toulouse who threw a Ukrainian woman and her child out on the street – people he had met through our site – in the middle of the night because he was drunk. This poor woman found herself with her suitcase and her child in her arms in the middle of the night, without money, in a country whose language she doesn't speak and whose laws she doesn't know to defend herself.
So if you're a man, simply: be quiet and admire the courage of these women, courage you can't hold a candle to.
What they're really looking for
You must understand that these women are not looking for a one-night stand. They're looking for marriage, a lifelong union, a partner with whom to build a stable and loving family.
If you're not serious about your intentions, don't bother. Don't waste their time. Don't give them false hope. They deserve better than that.
To explore this topic further, I invite you to visit our blog section for more insights on building successful relationships with Eastern European women.
Important reminder: These women are not looking for a one-night stand. They're looking for marriage, a lifelong union. If you're not serious about your approach, please refrain. The CQMI Agency only supports men who have a sincere intention to build a family.
Take action now
Our marriage agency has developed a formula that works. Our $350 CAD subscription for 1 month allows you to get 10 contacts of women who are sincerely interested in building a serious relationship.
This is our "secret sauce": we don't sell you dreams, we put you in contact with women who share your values and intentions. Women who have made the courageous choice to seek love abroad.
Do you have questions? Contact me directly: antoine@cqmi.ca
Antoine Monnier
Founder of CQMI Agency