The Inevitable Question: Why Are You Looking for a Wife in Ukraine?

If you've already started exchanging messages with a Ukrainian woman, you may have heard it already. If not, brace yourself: it's coming, guaranteed. This question weighs on the mind of every Ukrainian woman. Some will ask you directly, looking straight into your eyes during your very first video call. Others, more reserved, will try to figure out the answer through your messages, your reactions, your silences.

Here it is, the famous question:

This question is not trivial. It conceals a deep worry, a legitimate fear that any intelligent woman would feel in this situation. And believe me, Ukrainian women are particularly intelligent.

What This Question Really Reveals

Behind this question lies a very real fear. The Ukrainian woman is wondering: "Does this man have problems that prevent him from finding a partner in his own country? Is he coming here looking for a woman he imagines will be easier, more desperate because of the war?"

Let me be direct with you: this question is perfectly legitimate. It shows a woman who thinks, who protects herself, who doesn't want to be someone's second choice by default. You'd better know how to answer it quickly and confidently, because I guarantee she will listen to every single word of your response with heightened attention.

I've seen brilliant men freeze up when faced with this question, stumbling through awkward answers that instantly cooled their conversation partner's interest. Don't make that mistake.

The Answer You Must Absolutely Avoid

Yes, we all know it: the male-to-female ratio on Western dating sites is catastrophic. I explained it in detail in my article about the truth about male competition in the West. The numbers speak for themselves: 90 men for every 10 women on most Western platforms. Mathematically, the battle is lost before it even begins for many men.

But I strongly advise against giving this explanation to a Ukrainian woman. Why? Because she will immediately categorize you as a man who failed to attract women in his own country. You'll come across as a "loser" in her eyes, even if that's completely unfair. Perception matters as much as reality.

The Answers That Hit the Mark

1. The Decline of Western Women

As I developed in my article about shared custody and the abandonment of motherhood, Western women have progressively abandoned their roles as mothers and wives, with the blessing of governments embracing feminist ideologies.

Explain to her frankly: "Building a family with a woman who sees divorce as a profitable financial option, who is ready to abandon her children every other week without any remorse—that's not my life plan. I'm looking for a real partner, a woman who shares my family values."

This answer will resonate deeply with your Ukrainian conversation partner. She will understand, share your indignation, and most importantly, she will respect you for your clear-sightedness.

2. Slavic Beauty — With Finesse

Can you mention that Russian and Ukrainian women are extraordinarily beautiful and feminine? Absolutely. Around the world, being married to a Ukrainian woman confers a certain status. Men envy you—that's a fact.

But be careful how you phrase it! You must very quickly personalize your compliment. Never stay in generalities, or you'll trigger her jealousy and competitive instincts. Tell her instead:

"Slavic women are known for their elegance, that's true. But it's you I'm interested in, it's your personality that attracted me to your profile."

On the other hand, you can freely explain that women in your country dress like men, adopt rough behaviors, and have lost that natural femininity that attracts you so much. The contrast will speak for itself.

3. The Cultural Richness of an International Family

This is a powerful argument that showcases your intellectual depth. Share your vision with her: a family where two cultures meet, two worldviews enrich each other, where children grow up naturally bilingual or even trilingual.

Ukrainian women aren't just beautiful—they're intellectually brilliant, educated at prestigious universities. I've met Ukrainian women who knew Tolstoy, Dostoevsky, and even Shakespeare better than most of our Western clients! This thirst for culture, this open-mindedness, is a treasure you won't easily find elsewhere.

A Crucial Point to Never Forget

These women are not looking for a one-night stand. They're not on apps to "swipe" endlessly. They're looking for marriage, a lifelong union, a serious man to build a family with.

If that's not where you're at, if you think you can "take advantage" of the situation, please stay away. These women have an infallible radar for detecting men who aren't sincere. And frankly, that's not what we stand for at CQMI Agency.

My Final Advice

There are many valid reasons to answer this question. But I strongly advise you to think about it in advance, calmly, before your first video call or your first meeting. When the moment comes—and it will come—you'll want to be ready. Not all reasons are good to share, and how you phrase them matters as much as the substance.

Prepare your answer. Rehearse it. Make it your own. It needs to sound authentic, not rehearsed.

Questions about your personal situation? Don't hesitate to contact me directly: antoine@cqmi.ca

Antoine Monnier
Founder of CQMI Agency